Screw losing weight, I’m healthy and hot enough. Real things that need to be addressed in 2013:
1. Stop being lazy by being constantly “busy.” It’s easy to be busy. It justifies never having enough time to clean, cook for yourself, go out with friends, or meet new people. But every time you give in to your ‘busyness,’ it’s usually you who’s making the decision, not the demands of your job. It also maintains a constant level of stress that is not justified by the actual amount of work you need to do.
2. Stop seeking out distractions. You will always be able to find them anyway.
3. Stop identifying myself as a cliche and start treating myself as an individual. Constantly checking your life against a prewritten narrative or story of how things “should” be is a bought-into way of life. It’s sort of like renting your identity. It isn’t you. You are more nuanced than the narrative you try to fit yourself into, and more complex than the story that “should” be happening.
4. Stop expecting people to be better than they were in high school — learn how to deal with it instead. Just because you’re out of high school doesn’t mean you’re out of high school. There will always be people in your life who want what you have, are threatened by who you are, and will ridicule you for doing something that threatens how they see their position in the world.
5. Stop being stingy. If you really care about something, spend your money on it. There is often a notion that you are saving for something. Either clarify what that thing is or start spending your money on things that are important to you. Spend money on road trips. Spend money on healthy food. Spend money on opportunities. Spend money on things you’ll keep.
6. Stop treating errands as burdens. Instead, use them as time to focus on doing one thing, and doing it right. Errands and chores are essentially rote tasks that allow you time to think. They function to get you away from your phone, the internet, and other distractions. Focus and attention span are difficult things to maintain when you’re focused and attentive on X amount of things at any given moment.
7. Stop blaming myself for being human. You’re fine. Having a little anxiety is fine. Being scared is fine. Having an obscene amount of debt is (by the standards of your culture and demographic) fine. Your secrets are fine. You’re well-meaning. You’re intelligent. You’re blowing it out of proportion. You’re fine.
8. Stop considering the same things I’ve always done as the only options there are. It’s unlikely that one of the things you’ll regret when you’re older is not having consumed enough booze in your 20s, or not having bought enough $5 lattes, or not having gone out to brunch enough times, or not having spent enough time on the internet. Fear of missing out is a real, toxic thing. You’ve figured out drinking and going out. You’ve experimented enough. You’ve gotten your fill of internet memes. Figure something else out.
9. Stop buying (or spending time on) things I know I’ll throw away. Invest in friendships that aren’t parasitic. Spend your time on things that aren’t distractions. Put your stock in fleeting opportunity. Focus on the important.